Running a race with no clear route

So I just got off the phone with our adoption coordinator and it sounds like I better just brace myself for the next few months. After a month without any movement on our waitlists I was really hoping to talk to her today and get some glimmer of hope. Instead I got a lot of what I always get, articulate explanations of the process without any answers because there aren't really any answers to have. So I called with the hope that I would say, "hmmm, there hasn't been any movement on our lists in a month...any reason for this?" and she would say, "Oh, don't worry, it has been a month so you should see some movement here soon".

Instead, I got to learn that 1) Ethiopian elections are coming up in May, and 2) the Director of IAN is traveling to Ethiopia this week to work on a bunch of operational stuff, including that she is pursuing three additional orphanages to potentially work with because IAN's demand for children has grown substantially 3) Our expected wait for referral has doubled

1) The election: I was told that when elections approach in Ethiopia things slow down in general. It isn't really "business as usual" there during election time like it is here. Not specifically related to adoption, just in general and that it may effect the speed which children move through "the system". Okay, but what about the actual election? That is just plain stressful to me, because who knows what the adoption policies will look like after the election. They may change, they may stay the same. The newly elected government may continue to be open to international adoption, or they may not. If I had a wish, it would be that there wasn't going to be an election anytime soon so that I wouldn't have to worry about how that will effect Ethiopian adoption (though in reality elections are so important, more important than our adoption - I just wish they weren't happening while we are trying to adopt)

2) IAN's director traveling to Ethiopia this week will hopefully bode well for IAN and us waiting families. This is definitely something that could result in great things for IAN if they are able to work with additional orphanages. More orphanages = more children for referrals = more children being matched with waiting families. Hoping/praying for a miracle here.

3) Referral timing doubling. Finally - the last piece of news I received is that the time from waitlist to referral has been increased from 4-7 months (what we were originally told) to 8-12 months - I have been told this is strictly related to demand. The lists have really grown in the last six months. Still it is exhausting news to hear. Right now it just feels like the longer we are in the process - the farther away the end seems. It is like training for a marathon, starting the race and after mile 4 they tell you "Sorry you have been training for a 26 mile run, but due to circumstances we can't really explain and situations out of our control your race may now be 40 miles...or maybe longer....or shorter....what?...why are you freaking out? We told you marathons are hard!"

I'm starting to picture Sammy being closer to 4, 5, 6? when his little sister comes home.

I actually thought being on the waitlist would be fun. Checking every week (okay every day) to see how much closer we were, watching the boys get excited with Mike and I as we moved closer up the list. So far its been more like sitting in the waiting room at the DMV (or immigration services): your life in the hands of other people, powerless over the timing, being expected to sit quietly, don't get upset.....and wait.

At least the "news" didn't rock me quite as hard emotionally as other news has recently. Maybe the marathon training is paying off. Regardless, right now I just want to throw a shoe at something and at the same time begging for a water break.